During the question time after a talk I gave about relationships, a number of questions focussed on older people’s relationships with the younger generation.

“I want the best for her, a future with a degree, a good job…she can wait with the partying for later.”

“The world is not a safe place. When he is out at late, I worry whether he is still okay.”

“I thought we were on the same page, but the next day she was out all night again…”

Older people’s motives are often love and concern, they do have the youth’s best interests at heart. But as I listened to what people were sharing, I also became aware that they were focussing on what they had said and not on what they had heard the younger individuals say…